Thursday, May 29, 2008

New Horizons in Chutzpa

A yeshiva bocher who is looking for a Shidduch writes the following in this week's Yated:

90% of us boys have rabbeim whom we speak to during the dating process. From the girls I have dated and hear about, it seems that only 10% speak with someone smarter than them to help make the right decisions (and parents don’t count).

Recently, a major shadchan wrote an article stating that 80% of the time, it’s the girl who says no at an advanced stage because “it just didn’t click,” which is not a real reason that any rov would say is enough to break a potential shidduch.

So it looks like this bocher believes that marriage is properly a matter decided between a boy's rebbe and a girl's rebbe. Not only don't the parents have a say, neither do the potential chattan and kallah!


Anonymous said...

Interesting blog - you cover quite a range of topics.

When you have a moment, I would like to invite you to visit a new online Jewish publication which focuses on themes of modern Jewish identity:

We're always looking for new contributors so if you or someone you know might be interested in submitting something we would be happy to hear from you.

Orthonomics said...

"Parents don't count" says a lot about the society that is being build around us. Sad.

Anonymous said...

My brother told a story about a guy who consulted with his rebbe before his first date - got a list of what to ask, what to say, and what to do. Same for second date. And third. They eventually got engaged without him saying a single creative or original thing. I wonder the girl didn't just marry the rebbe.