Thursday, May 29, 2008

New Horizons in Chutzpa

A yeshiva bocher who is looking for a Shidduch writes the following in this week's Yated:

90% of us boys have rabbeim whom we speak to during the dating process. From the girls I have dated and hear about, it seems that only 10% speak with someone smarter than them to help make the right decisions (and parents don’t count).

[snip]
Recently, a major shadchan wrote an article stating that 80% of the time, it’s the girl who says no at an advanced stage because “it just didn’t click,” which is not a real reason that any rov would say is enough to break a potential shidduch.


So it looks like this bocher believes that marriage is properly a matter decided between a boy's rebbe and a girl's rebbe. Not only don't the parents have a say, neither do the potential chattan and kallah!

3 comments:

Daniel E. Levenson said...

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SephardiLady said...

"Parents don't count" says a lot about the society that is being build around us. Sad.

badforshidduchim said...

My brother told a story about a guy who consulted with his rebbe before his first date - got a list of what to ask, what to say, and what to do. Same for second date. And third. They eventually got engaged without him saying a single creative or original thing. I wonder the girl didn't just marry the rebbe.