Sunday, May 27, 2007

On post-death baptism by Mormons

Rescuing this from an older source and posting it in response to a friend's post:

According to Mormon theology, all post-death baptism offers is a chance for the deceased person to join the Mormon religion. Since they think everyone else is in hell, they naturally assume everyone accepts. Here's how I picture it.

It is a lovely Shabbat evening in heaven. (It is always Shabbat there). Mr and Mrs Levy and their children have just finished singing Shalom Aleichem when there is a knock at the door. Mr Levy opens it and an angel is standing there, looking uncomfortable.

Mr. Levy smiles. "We were just singing to welcome you. What a pleasant surprise! What a great timing!".

The angel squirms. "Actually, Mr. Levy, I'm just here to ask you if you want to become a Mormon." Mr Levy roars with laughter, and says "No thanks. Are you sure you don't have time for some kugel? In heaven there is always time for kugel!"

The angel enters, says amen to the kiddush, winds up staying for the full meal, and then sadly departs to ask the next person if they want to convert.

1 comment:

Tracy Hall Jr said...

Thanks, Larry, for tackling this issue with a sense of humor.

You've actually hit it right on the nail. Our proxy baptisms have no validity without the informed, free-will consent of those for whom they are performed.

And yes, we Mormons do plan on doing quite a bit of door-knocking in the world to come! Thanks for feeding the angel -- it might someday be me!

Looking forward to meeting you,